Monday

Delicious. Steve Almond is guest blogging over at Bookslut. Steve is one of the few writers I’m willing to cast aside my vow of celibacy for. In fact, he happened to be in one of my dreams just this past weekend. It went a little something like this:

***
{Setting: Airport. Steve and I are boarding a crowded plane to Beijing.}

Me: [confused, can’t find my seat, can’t find my ticket]

Steve: [sits down in aisle seat]

Me: [sit down next to him, in window seat]

Stewardess: [brings Steven and I each a porcelain bowl of roasted pumpkin seeds] What can I get you to drink?

Amy: [yelling over sudden roar of engine] BLOODY MARY!!

Steve: [to me] IS THAT ALL YOU WANT?

Amy: WHAT?

Steve: [to me] YOU WANT TO GET SOME WEED?

Amy: WHAT?!?!

Stewardess: [to Steve] WE WON’T BE MAKING A STOP IN EGYPT!!

Amy: [Notices people are sitting in doorway of plane, thinks about how dangerous that is. Wants to get off plane.]
***

And he's not kidding about "the single funniest piece of writing in the known world." (And get this: He's currently teaching at BC! So close! Close enough to stalk on a semi-regular basis, even.)

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