[misc] So I guess I won't get that rocking chair I want.

Dollar came down to the kitchen last night for supper and he had his cell phone pressed to his chest.

"It's my grandmother," he said like I should be as alarmed as him. "She said she wants to talk to you."

I'm like, "Uh... wtf?" getting appropriately alarmed.

He shrugged and handed me the phone. I think we were both worried that, worst case scenario, she had had enough of us living in sin and needed to know exactly when the wedding would be. Turned out, she was just wondering about the pattern I used to knit a hat for his dad as a Christmas present. She loved the hat and wondered if I could run her off a copy (tee hee, I think she was referring to a carbon copy).

No problem. I explained that the hat was written as flat and was meant to be seamed shut. I told her that I modified it to knit in the round. She said, "Oh yes, you used three short knitting pins?" (tee hee, I used a circular needle but I think those might be a little too new for her.)

So anyway, we chat for a bit and I give the phone back to Dollar. I could hear his grandmother saying that she had some free time now that the holidays are over and wanted to try to get back into knitting. She also got a National Geographic puzzle of her town, so she was going to work on that, too.

I looked at the puzzle I was working on on the dining room table.

She said, "Oh, you know, I want something to do other than my sudoku and crossword puzzles."

I think about the sudoku and crossword puzzle books I keep in the bathroom.

Yeeaaah. Dollar gets off the phone and I'm like, "Am I a grandma? Am I your grandma? Knitting. Puzzles. Sudoku."

Dollar nodded.

Now I want to go out and do something decidedly un-grannylike. I can't... um... think of anything at the moment. But it's got to involve wheelbarrows full of hookers and blow, right?

Actually, I'm in the middle of the cold that everyone's been getting so I guess I'll just stick to my vitamin c tea. Siiiiigh.


gayle said...

Maybe she's a granddaughter at heart, rather than a grandmother. She could be emulating you rather than the other way around...
Either that, or you need to get a tattoo. A really big one.

Sara said...

Hope you are feeling better soon ... take care of yourself.

Anonymous said...

Hope you feel better soon. But the image of a wheelbarrow full of hookers and blow is impressive.