Tuesday

[movies] A History of Bad Corn

I watched A History of Violence last night. I thought it was incredibly sad. I knew there was going to be violence but I wasn't expecting so much drama. And crazy sex. I thought it was good but Dollar thought it was awesome. Probably because of the crazy sex. Although... Now it seems suspicious to me that he liked it so much. Take for instance this phone conversation I had last night-

AMY: Hello?

MAN: [gruff voice] Ey. Lemme talk to Tony.

AMY: Tony? I'm sorry but you've got the wrong number.

MAN: No I don't.

AMY: Um... I don't know anyone named T-

MAN: Yes you do. He sleeps right next to you.

AMY: Listen, I'm sorry but-

MAN: He took my eye! I'm gonna kill 'em!

AMY: [click]


In other movies, of the corn variety, we got a superhero spoof that was way, way beyond terrible. One girl had the power of invisibility (but apparently had to become naked before turning invisible), another girl had the power to make men do whatever she wanted (that's not really a super-power, sweetie, that's just called 'being manipulative') and the other girl had the power of fire- which I didn't see her use to an impressive effect because the movie was such crap we had to stop watching.

Another movie featured a quite famous corn star- and her rock star husband. I didn't recognize him but Dollar did. I was like, "Are we going to have to watch this guy do his wife? Cuz, ah ha ha, that's kind of weird." Yeah, we did have to. And it was weird. We also had to see him casually slap her cheek when she wasn't paying attention to the task at hand. It was a light slap but Dollar and I turned to each other, like, "Did you just see that? Did he... Did he just slap her?" Apres the slap, a look came across her face that said What did you just slap me for? So apparently every was surprised by it.

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